


an F in chat for riptide's single braincell

by Peruse



Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One), Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Drabble, Gen, Gen Work, look this was a shitpost drabble i wrote in 4 minutes and it shows dude, riptide is a himbo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:53:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25994773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peruse/pseuds/Peruse
Summary: riptide doesnt know what a snail is and ratchet wants to be left alone
Comments: 2
Kudos: 35





	an F in chat for riptide's single braincell

**Author's Note:**

> look, this was part of a warm up art/writing exercise between pix and i where i came up with a shitpost prompt and we just had to throw something at the wall/write about it as fast as possible with instant commitment using our first thought. it shows very much. it was a great warm up but too bad i was drinking and got distracted right after watching youtube for 2 hours and lost all motivation. either way, im only posting it bc she posted hers otherwise this would just die bc its 200 words or whatever and im bad at both comedy and dialogue. 
> 
> While we didn't discuss our og plans and only revealed the final result, ironically, they look like they belong in the same scene so it worked out well. https://twitter.com/ParallelPie/status/1296132243149271040
> 
> for the love of all, please go read like...actual good works ive written.

“Riptide…for the fifth time, I can’t help you.”

“Yea you can! You just gotta, you’re a doctor, and do doctor-things!”

Ratchet leaned back on his heels as Riptide leaned forward. His servos were open and on a principle, he refused to look.

“Yea, I’m a _Cybertronian_ Doctor, I don’t know organics. Even-“ he said, raising his voice and giving the taller mech a pointed look, “if I lived on Earth for what? Less than four percent of a vorn.”

“But he needs help” Riptide needled, for a large mech he sure had puppy dog eyes –too bad he didn’t know what a dog was

“ _If_ I look at it, will you leave me alone?” Because really, the last thing Ratchet wanted was for organic slag to get into his medbay.

“Yea!” Riptide said, as if he wasn’t going to ask Ratchet tomorrow during breakfast.

Ratchet let out a long, low sigh.

“Fine. Show me. What’s the problem.”

As if on cue, Riptide’s face dropped and he slowly shuffled forward, his servos still out.

“Jemmy lost his shell and- and I don’t know where it went. Will it grow back? Is he okay?”

Ratchet tilted his helm up and frowned at the ceiling before slowly dropping his gaze to other mech’s servos. He didn’t see anything and upped his zoom.

Riptide was holding a slug. Ratchet didn’t know the exact species but he didn’t care enough to bother referencing it.

“His shell?”

“Yea! I went on the Earth internet, Swerved helped me, and Jemmy is supposed to have a shell that he lives in.”

“….Like a snail?” He saw the creature leave a trail in Riptide’s servos and resisted the urge to take a step back. Disgusting creatures.

“He is a snail! He just lost his shell. I tried to make him one but he doesn’t like it.”

“Riptide, it doesn’t need a shell.”

“But all of them had a shell! Is he special?”

Ratchet’s first and second thought were to agree, but that wouldn’t solve the issue.

“No, it’s a slug.”

“Oh, okay!” There was a pause, “What’s a slug? Is he okay. Is it like a snail?”

“…A slug is a member of the Gastropod Class along wit– it’s a snail without a shell.”

“So Jemmy _is_ special.”

“Sure is.”

“I’m glad! Thank you Ratchet! You know so much! If me and Jemmy have any other issues I’ll let you know!” Ratchet’s hand jerked out to get Riptide to stop talking, “Though just in case, I’ll keep getting him shells to see if he wants them!” At that Riptide ran off and Ratchet’s hand dropped to his side.

Slag it.

**Author's Note:**

> shrug. man youre the one who clicked on it


End file.
